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#0 My dead family and I are in your debt. #1 I had a problem. #2 Making a play for power. #3 I am an Activation Enthusiast. #4 Trial and error are my speciality. #5 Dicta space Typist #6 JOB SKILL: I show initiative #7 I need to be a chicken farmer. #8 A recent example. #9 The demon in Joey #10 Silver shears #11 Doomed. You're doomed. #12 You're such a child. #13 A magnet shaped like a kitten! Dear Mister Mayor How are you? #14 No longer poetry, but noise. #15 Art vs Life! TITLE BOUT. #16 Newspapermen need love too. #17 Run on, love. Run on. #18 All these scraps with no signatures. #19 The relevance of background checks. #20 I'm coming down there. #21 clean your body with fire. #22 There's two ways this can go. #23 I wonder if another woman is what we really need. #24 You can't hand out candy apples with broken thumbs. #25 Maybe I should buy you a book on being prettier. #26 Have you got cervix in a can? Well you'd better let her out! #27 Lend me that book and you can be sure I'll see you again! #28 Soiled Soiled Soiled Soiled Soiled Soiled JUS-TICE #29 If I don't get this job there is no god. #30 If you want to sing out, sing out. #31 It must cost a lot to feed a dog like that. #32 The Puerto-Rican girl reminded me of my mother. #33 What have children got to do with it? #34 The time of my life. #35 My father was a great man. #35 apology letter A visit from the police. #36 Back in Black. After the episode with the police, I stopped sending the letters out for a while. Then it occurred to me I could just send them to companies in other countries. Big, silly companies like Yahoo, Microsoft, Adobe, Sony, etc. #37 YAHOO.COM: Chkm8_slutz. #38 THE RIAA: Where's Willy? #39 THE FCC: My resume indicates a previous position avec your mom? #40 GMAIL: Conspiracy theories? #41 NYPD: It's hard, but it's harder to ignore it. #42 APPLE.COM: in 1984 I was still my momma's boy. #43 Microsoft: March 15th: I'm pregnant. It isn't his. #44 FRITO LAY: I'm so, so sorry. (this OQ is for Sheryl) #45 Hallmark: Know what I mean? #46 amazon: already #47 Nintendo: "make an equation of love" #48 RAND Corporation: Please don't send this one back. #49 Bill Gates: Money is so awesome. #50 FOX: I cut the bit about sex. #51 WAL-MART: Nice women don't want the panties. #52 HBO: Yellow fever. #53 Random House: A Young Lady's Primer. #54 Toyota: Marketing. #55 MYSPACE: cats or lesbians. #56 Gillette: The best a man can get. #57 The BBC: Why not choose love? #58 The RIAA: A hobby should pass the time, not fill it. #59 FX: Am I right, ladies? Am I right? |